Shill Episode #8: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

0:28 In a major Shill milestone Doug and Dave get drunk together in meatspace and nearly apologize for another delayed Shill episode.

1:30 Dave introduces the topic of National Digital Media Day, Doug re-christens it International Year of Mitch Joel’s shoes. Doug feels that the idea is past due, as in 13 years out-of-date.

4:15 Doug connects Digital Media Day to communications, while Dave yanks in the reigns, saying it is merely another tool for geeks to get revenge over being ostracized in high-school.

5:00 Doug overshares that twitter causes genital “shrinkage” and <metaphor alert>social media is not a democracy, but is a wolf pack</metaphor alert> Dave paints a mental image of Doug that a real editor would have cut out.

7:55 Doug interjects and points out the Shill platitude of “the link is in the show notes” is even less true than “the cheque is in the mail” (Google it for crying out loud people!). Dave and Doug make an impassioned plea for people to read the show notes instead of listening, while Dave attempts to shoo the listener away like a wasp buzzing around his milkshake.

9:50 Alcoholic reinforcements arrive while Twitter Meglomania is discussed. Dave and Doug digress into a board games strategy discussion. Doug accuses the a-list twitterers of digital dick measuring.

14:30 Dave asks who do you want to be: The Velvet Underground or Duran Duran? Doug patiently attempts to hide his uncoolness and attempts to pull meaning out of the reference by making it relevant to a band he likes. Dave finally makes the connection and claims that size doesn’t matter it is the motion of the ocean or something else that makes him feel comfortable with his inadequacy.

19:00 Doug quotes his bro, Graham and sticks another needle into the a-listers’ eye and their Manson Family craptastics.

20:35 Dave apologies to Jason Calacanis for not playing his submitted comment. And like a pack-rat shut-in trapped under a stack of old newspapers, Shill dies forgotten until the stench alerts the neighbours.
“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know how dumb they are at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Navel Gazing, Show Notes, Tortured Metaphors by dwalker
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 Shill Podcast #7 [18:59m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

0:35 Dave reads a comment from Tamera Kremer who wonders what brand of irritant Dave uses to stay cranky for Shill.

1:20 Doug vomits up the topic of treating social media as a business strategy versus a communications tactic, which leaves a funny taste in his mouth. Dave coins the phrase Cluetailtipinomics to describe the study of people like Ed Lee who gaze too deeply into the kool-aid sippy cup.

4:15 Doug’s Dog makes a cameo taking Doug away and thus briefly reducing Shill to a half-fat-vanilla-jackass-latte. Dave goes it alone questioning a significant link between advertising/PR and anything that gets CFOs all wet.

5:50 Doug wonders why Dell Ideastorm, MyStarbucksIdea and other digital comment cards are such a big deal. [Insert obligatory Seth Godin reference here]. Dave also mentions Paul Isakson’s awesome slideshare presentation.

7:30 Dave plugs a “Tell, don’t Ask” agenda quoting Sony. Doug loses 30 Apple Fanboy points by picking at the Newton and Mac Cube scabs.

10:15 Is Apple too good for social media? (without sarcasm) opines Dave and their sales haven’t suffered a bit.

12:30 Doug conjures a few corporate corpses to warn of the ills of having business strategy too tied to a chosen medium. Dave points out that companies like GM may be shoveling cash from mass to online, but it ain’t all going to blogs.

15:30 Doug finds a long-winded way of saying that one man’s reputational disaster is another’s perfect storm in a teapot.

17:25 Dave takes a closing pot shot at Ed Lee and Doug verbally strangles himself, thus squeezing Shill’s neck to a spasmodically convulsing death

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know how dumb they are at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Show Notes by dwalker
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 Shill Podcast #6: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

0:31 Dave vainly tries to present a softer, gentler side of himself, by introducing the wishy-washy topic of everything new is old again. Doug smells blood in the water and writes a cheque his ass can’t cash.

1:30 The wide awake listener will notice that Dave doesn’t really believe that things have changed much. Doug snorts his contempt while spouting new media bafflegab like a tongue-tied politician on a filibuster. And so Shill hits cruising speed.

2:00 Doug shouts the obvious from the rooftops, claiming that infinite media tends towards zero value while Dave quietly laughs up his sleeves.

3:18 Dave tries hopelessly to make sense of the senseless. Doug verbally bludgeons Dave like an obtuse child while expecting retribution from the listener for his own obtuse claims.

4:49 Dave makes a withdrawal from the Clue Bank reminding us that there has always been more content than any human being could intake. Doug accuses the whole Internet of piracy by saying that to consume digital content is to copy. He also admits to boarding the SNL bandwagon en route.

7:30 Dave plays the Doug Whisperer and tries to tease some sense out of Doug’s ranting and wonders whether searching for needles in a haystack is a good use of time.

8:10 TRITENESS WARNING: Doug brings up Sturgeon’s Saw.. er Law.

9:05 Dave attempts to claim a point for Team Status Quo talking about the value of editors and the hassle of DIY media. Doug pats Dave on the head and says that the glut of content allows for blessings like LOLCats to thrive, which would have been impossible in traditional content.

12:31 Dave conjures the ghost of repeater bloggers and value creation wondering aloud how social media only took two years to be inane when it took traditional media a few decades.

13:35 Smug bastard Doug takes a cheap shot at Dave calling him linear in a networked world and then doubles the output at the abstruse factory. He further embarrasses himself using an archaic meaning of the word “Ho!” like a grade school Shakespeare play.

15:16 Dave comes to Doug’s rescue and makes his point for him that the network does indeed bring value to finding content of interest and admits to stalking his favourite echo chamberites via twitter.

17:10 Dave again wonders about the value of repeater blogs and attempts to close Shill where it started. This gets Doug’s goat and in a fit of irritation says that saying everything is the same is sloppy thinking, he then gives his own hypocrisy a hug.

21:12 Doug questions the value of the last 21 minutes and then like a teenager driving a manual transmission, Shill splutters and lurches to an end.

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know how dumb they are at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Marketing, Show Notes by dwalker
7 Comments »

 

 Shill Podcast #5 [25:03m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

oo:30 Doug disses those who are trying to be first…and another episode of Shill rains down on an unsuspecting world like a rainshower downwind from Chernobyl

Due to an explosive case of SXSW diarrhea, Doug  dropped 25-30% of the people he followed on Twitter. They don’t miss him

1:35 Dave carries on. Smugly. Moans about live blogging and live tweeting. Dave goes on a tirade about what a circle jerk social media is to begin with. Why is he so cranky all the time? Try Metamucil.

3:30 Dave and Doug try to conceal their jealousy over not going to Austin to bitch about all the useless tweets from twits re breakfast, parties, drinks and Zuckerburg

5:18 Dave kicks twitterers in their collective sack while they’re down by trashing their geekiness for complaining about not getting into a Facebook party. “Closed party for a closed platform,” said one twit. Boo fucking hoo.

7:35 In a moment of clarity due to the booze wearing off, Doug mercifully brings Shill back to the topic at hand: What’s the value of being first?

Dave questions the notion (again) that it’s possible to miss something and then berates beta bitches and reems out all the people constantly tweeting about seesmic, mahalo and qik

9:00 Realizing that people are asking the question: If you hate Twitter so much, why do you bother with it? Dave tries to placate the kool-aid crowd by saying he likes it for the social chat aspect. Doug, of course, rightly calls bullshit and Dave admits he’s a misanthrope. Deal with it.

10:34 Apparetnly Doug said something funny on Twitter. A new national holiday may form around this historic event. We’ll just have to wait and see. Oh yeah, the funny line: “if you have time to follow 500+ on Twitter you need a job.” Dave commends him on being Shatner-esque, but notes Doug’s hair much more lifelike than Bill’s. Doug accepts the compliment.

11:10 It wouldn’t be an episode without a self-important, esoteric metaphor from Doug. This one is tortured: Social Media is like a river. You don’t need to swim on every molecule of the river to have fun. You’re missing the point if you’re worrying about the water that’s missing you. Deep, man. Deep. And I Am The Walrus.

12:06 Dave and Doug muse about dumping feeds and going to keywords only. Doug makes some sort of reasonable point, but nobody can understand it because he too goddam cheap to buy a pop screen for his mic. Perhaps his mom will knit him one for Christmas..

14:20 In this segment, Dave uses the phrase “feed whore” and “people have drunk so much kool-aid, they’re stained red.” How very Shill of him. Being a jerk just comes so easy to him.

16:19 Doug spends too much time keeping tabs on things. But apparently Perez Hilton and World of Warcraft don’t reveal enough information that’s relevant to his clients.

18:10 More blather about not retaining any info, consuming vs. contributing, blah, blah, blah. Doug and Dave may actually make some sense here. Jury’s still out, though.

19:23 Dave uses the phrase “Mr. Fancy Pants.” Did he really just say that? Doug lets it go, though inside he’s plotting a way to have Dave killed.

19:47 Dave goes off the rails on the SMR…Doug bitchslaps him back to reality by using a made up word he must have heard at an ad agency brainstorm: Tangenting. For real. Dave let’s it go. But is planning Doug’s untimely demise as you read this.

That wraps Shill at 20:12…but no. Like a bad slasher flick, Doug brings it back to life when you thought it was killed.

20:25 Doug has another topic, statemement, manifesto…Dave bitches about being cut off, but Doug has something that can’t wait. It’s well known that Shill has a listener. Doug values our listener very highly. However, there’s another listener that Doug values much less. This listener uses WinAmp…Doug rails at them…luddite…WinAmp was the shit in 96…Doug worries for a moment that he could be out of lunch? Who the fuck knows. (and the phrase is out TO lunch, dumbass.)

Dave wonders if Jerry Yang or Steve Ballmer could be using WinAmp. They are invited to provide a comment or money.

Doug introduces the idea of accepting advertising. Dave claims to be wealthy.

Doug says you can advertise if we can do the ad with no input from the client.

23:00 Dave begs to wrap the show, but due to low IQ, poor breeding and lack of general nutrition in his formative years, can’t remember the show number or the e-mail address.

Dave invites listeners to provide comments for us to not play and then mock mercilessly.

And like the drunk step-uncle who has overstayed his welcome and is uncomfortably hitting on your 16-year-old cousin, Shill is shown the door.

Tags: Show Notes by David Jones
7 Comments »

 

 Shill Podcast #4 [20:33m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Show Notes

0:47 After some stammering Doug tells a graphic story of what happens to hapless cows in the Amazon and somehow believes it to be relevant to Social Media. Dave is kind enough to mute his mic while laughing up his sleeves.

2:23 Having set the stage Doug burns it down revealing that only bloody cows get skinned by piranhas. He also starts dreaming about polluting the literary world with yet another vague metaphor-based business book

3:35 Dave props up Doug’s rickety construct with some vague generalizations of his own, but agrees that brands get the terrorism they deserve and trots out the Wal-mart example.

6:30 Doug steps out of character and tries to push the conversation toward the positive. Dave trots out another tired case study: Apple.

8:00 Doug steals Collin Douma’s thought on the Brand Immune System, combining two esoteric metaphors in a blatant attempt to confuse listeners.

10:24 Dave reveals his greatest fear: throwing a party to have no one show. Kind of like the Shill podcast. Doug feints by linking Dave to PT Barnum, but actually agrees with him.

12:23 Dave talks about engaging versus parroting messages. Doug hits Dave where it hurts by bringing up Mitch Joel again.

14:00 Doug reveals a sore point of his past life as a Customer Service Rep and how he was trained to be incompetent and irrelevant. He also pulls out another ill-thought metaphor of CSRs as untrained soldiers.

15:30 Dave comes to Doug’s rescue with the RIM example of how they don’t own the relationship, the reseller does, but RIM still takes crap for the problems when reseller shifts blame.

16:00 Conversation tangents to cell phones, where lack of industry knowledge barely impedes the flow of opinion. Doug expects to be chastised by the listener for his mistakes.

17:55 Discussion of unlocked and hacked iPhones, illustrates some important point that eludes both hosts - could be the alcohol.

20:05 With the elegance of a rhino doing needlepoint, Doug slits the throat of another episode of Shill.

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know how dumb they are at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Marketing, Show Notes, Tortured Metaphors by dwalker
6 Comments »

 

 Shill Podcast #3: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Show Notes

0:19 False Start: Dave doesn’t make the appointed time for the podcast and leaves Doug with the audio equivalent of his pants around his ankles.

1:00 Do-over start followed by Doug’s personal cover version of the theme music for the entertainment of himself and surely no one else. Dave starts the show with an uncomfortable silence.

1:55 Drink of the day revealed 12 year old single malts.

2:30 Dave reads out a general comment about the show from Listener Lisa proving the fact that Shill has at least one listener.

3:15 Doug pulls the rug out on the audience theory by pointing out that it was his wife who made the comment. Doug and Dave agree that bias is a dish best served often.

5:00 Dave discusses the Corporate Kryptonite that keeps him from bashing his own clients, but predictably no guarantees are made about the future, unless it causes him to downgrade his net connection to High Speed Light. Doug doesn’t like talking about his clients.

7:15 Jaws drop throughout the podosphere as Dave declares Shill to be light on research and heavy on opinion. Doug and Dave declare the podcast to be under the jurisdiction of bar rules.

10:05 Dave accuses Mitch Joel of being a real person.

11:10 Doug happily begins sawing off the limb he is sitting on.

12:20 Dave ensures listeners that the Shit List door is closed to anyone who knocks. Doug question’s Dave’s gender and narrowly avoids getting on the Shit List himself.

13:25 Dave acts like the hen-pecked husband of Shill (what does that make Doug?) because he is hounded to make the podcast. Doug is unapologetic for dumping Dave to go out to dinner with Mitch Joel.

14:30 Doug takes a beating for screwing up Mitch’s promo and loses 30 geek points for not being able to operate an audio recorder under the influence.

15:04 Out of sheer pique, Dave decides to drive another episode of Shill over the cliff.

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know what you think about Shill at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Navel Gazing, Show Notes by dwalker
7 Comments »

 

 Shill #2 [20:16m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Show Notes:

00:28 Doug & Dave discuss a recent e-Marketer reporter about 2008 hidden marketing trends. Verdict: rehash, nothing new, blah, blah, blah

01:40 Dave rants about media fragmentation being nothing new. Warning: obligatory and obvious reference to Bruce Springsteen by Dave.

02:29 Doug says notion of internet as marketing hub is as old as, well, the interwebs. Dave & Doug violently agree that smart marketers have been doing this forever.

05:53 Dave accuses Doug of smelling his own butt. Doug denies the accusation. Still friends…for now.

06:00 Dave & Doug go off on a tangent about marketers worrying too much about GRPs and not enough about really reaching their audiences. Doug notes how everything competes for our time.

07:51 F-bomb alert. Doug says the only way to stand out is to be “fucking awesome.” Pure genius…except for the mandatory Apple love.

08:50 More bad language…this time from Dave. Potty mouth. Basic point, don’t sweat the research…make something that people want. Obligatory Seth Godin reference. Dave is a name-dropping SOB.

10:00 Doug rails against the notion of “leadership” when most companies just follow. Dave says desire for growth is enemy of leadership.

11:30 More Apple references? Are these guys on retainer? Apple almost screwed it up, but iPod saved Apple. Doug and Dave chat up how the Microsoft Zune has no chance and how Xbox really helped their brand. Nintendo has apparently pulled an Apple. Way to go Wii!

14:30 Dave shows his age by admitting he can’t make an Xbox work. Loser. Doug and Dave mock fat gamers. Good times.

15:50 Doug thankfully brings it back on topic and sets Dave off on a rant about the term “aggregation.” Oh, Doug…

16:58 Doug says he’s over-reacting. Marketers need some efficiencies. Stops short of calling Dave a dumb-ass…for now.

18:24 Doug rants about marketing terminology. He says it treats them like the enemy.

18:54 Doug and Dave close the show smoothly like the pros that they are.

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know what you think about Shill at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Marketing, Show Notes by David Jones
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 Shill #1: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

UPDATE: Target might change its tune on bloggers

UPDATE 2: The New York Times piles on (hat tip: Kevin Dugan)

Show Notes:

00:22 David and Doug talk about Target’s lack of respect for “non-traditional media”

07:00 The discussion moves on to sex in advertising and their belief that Target wasn’t trying to be sexually suggestive at all with the billboard in question.

Theme Music:

“I Want To Hear What You Have To Say” by the Subways via the Podsafe Music Network.

Comments:

Let David and Doug know what you think about Shill at shillpodcast@gmail.com or visit the blog at shillpodcast.com

Tags: Dumb Moves, Show Notes by David Jones
10 Comments »