Shill Podcast - Being first, SXSW, playing in the river and WinAmp
oo:30 Doug disses those who are trying to be first…and another episode of Shill rains down on an unsuspecting world like a rainshower downwind from Chernobyl
Due to an explosive case of SXSW diarrhea, Doug dropped 25-30% of the people he followed on Twitter. They don’t miss him
1:35 Dave carries on. Smugly. Moans about live blogging and live tweeting. Dave goes on a tirade about what a circle jerk social media is to begin with. Why is he so cranky all the time? Try Metamucil.
3:30 Dave and Doug try to conceal their jealousy over not going to Austin to bitch about all the useless tweets from twits re breakfast, parties, drinks and Zuckerburg
5:18 Dave kicks twitterers in their collective sack while they’re down by trashing their geekiness for complaining about not getting into a Facebook party. “Closed party for a closed platform,” said one twit. Boo fucking hoo.
7:35 In a moment of clarity due to the booze wearing off, Doug mercifully brings Shill back to the topic at hand: What’s the value of being first?
Dave questions the notion (again) that it’s possible to miss something and then berates beta bitches and reems out all the people constantly tweeting about seesmic, mahalo and qik
9:00 Realizing that people are asking the question: If you hate Twitter so much, why do you bother with it? Dave tries to placate the kool-aid crowd by saying he likes it for the social chat aspect. Doug, of course, rightly calls bullshit and Dave admits he’s a misanthrope. Deal with it.
10:34 Apparetnly Doug said something funny on Twitter. A new national holiday may form around this historic event. We’ll just have to wait and see. Oh yeah, the funny line: “if you have time to follow 500+ on Twitter you need a job.” Dave commends him on being Shatner-esque, but notes Doug’s hair much more lifelike than Bill’s. Doug accepts the compliment.
11:10 It wouldn’t be an episode without a self-important, esoteric metaphor from Doug. This one is tortured: Social Media is like a river. You don’t need to swim on every molecule of the river to have fun. You’re missing the point if you’re worrying about the water that’s missing you. Deep, man. Deep. And I Am The Walrus.
12:06 Dave and Doug muse about dumping feeds and going to keywords only. Doug makes some sort of reasonable point, but nobody can understand it because he too goddam cheap to buy a pop screen for his mic. Perhaps his mom will knit him one for Christmas..
14:20 In this segment, Dave uses the phrase “feed whore” and “people have drunk so much kool-aid, they’re stained red.” How very Shill of him. Being a jerk just comes so easy to him.
16:19 Doug spends too much time keeping tabs on things. But apparently Perez Hilton and World of Warcraft don’t reveal enough information that’s relevant to his clients.
18:10 More blather about not retaining any info, consuming vs. contributing, blah, blah, blah. Doug and Dave may actually make some sense here. Jury’s still out, though.
19:23 Dave uses the phrase “Mr. Fancy Pants.” Did he really just say that? Doug lets it go, though inside he’s plotting a way to have Dave killed.
19:47 Dave goes off the rails on the SMR…Doug bitchslaps him back to reality by using a made up word he must have heard at an ad agency brainstorm: Tangenting. For real. Dave let’s it go. But is planning Doug’s untimely demise as you read this.
That wraps Shill at 20:12…but no. Like a bad slasher flick, Doug brings it back to life when you thought it was killed.
20:25 Doug has another topic, statemement, manifesto…Dave bitches about being cut off, but Doug has something that can’t wait. It’s well known that Shill has a listener. Doug values our listener very highly. However, there’s another listener that Doug values much less. This listener uses WinAmp…Doug rails at them…luddite…WinAmp was the shit in 96…Doug worries for a moment that he could be out of lunch? Who the fuck knows. (and the phrase is out TO lunch, dumbass.)
Dave wonders if Jerry Yang or Steve Ballmer could be using WinAmp. They are invited to provide a comment or money.
Doug introduces the idea of accepting advertising. Dave claims to be wealthy.
Doug says you can advertise if we can do the ad with no input from the client.
23:00 Dave begs to wrap the show, but due to low IQ, poor breeding and lack of general nutrition in his formative years, can’t remember the show number or the e-mail address.
Dave invites listeners to provide comments for us to not play and then mock mercilessly.
And like the drunk step-uncle who has overstayed his welcome and is uncomfortably hitting on your 16-year-old cousin, Shill is shown the door.
